I am overwhelmed with the generosity people have shown us! It is humbling to ask for money, but in asking for help, we have seen the work of Christ in action. Many people have expressed that they are grateful to help in our process to bring home our daughter. Those who have not been able to help financially have helped with their time and talents. They have been Christ's hands. We are so very grateful. THANK YOU to everyone who has supported us through prayer, made a financial donation, or has helped with one of our fundraisers. We appreciate your help more than we can adequately say in words.
Here's the update on our matching grant thus far. We have one more week to raise money, and are about 2/3 to our goal.
Monetary Donations - $1,650
Lasagna Dinner Fundraiser - $1,668
Matching Grant - $3,318
Total Funds Raised - $6,636
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Update on Liam's Heart
Today, Liam had his 6 month checkup on his heart. Overall, things are stable and no surgical or medical intervention is needed. Praise the Lord! There are four areas of concern in Liam's heart. Here are the results from today's checkup...
fluid around his heart - The fluid around Liam's heart, which was a concern the last two times we went to the doctor, is now minimal. It has decreased on its own without intervention. Now we know that his heart should heal itself when fluid develops due to viral infections. It's just a long process. Liam had the stomach flu in January, which created the fluid. His body took until now to heal it. It is impossible to keep him away from all viral infections, but sometimes I wish I could.
fused left Ventricle Valve - (two of the three parts of the valve are fused together, creating leakage and a murmur). There is no change in his valve. I was able to listen to the sound his murmur makes. Liam's heart has an extra swooshing sound between beats. It almost sounds like air whistling through his chest between beats. The leakage is minor enough that nothing should need to be done for a while, if ever.
hole between upper two chambers- We're still hoping that the hole heals itself by the time Liam is 4. It is still measuring the same size.
coarctation of the aorta - The main aorta that leads to the heart is narrowed. Last time we went in it was at a count of 13. The narrowing has increased and is now at 20. This number is likely to fluctuate due to growth spurts. Should the number reach 40, then we have reason to be concerned. If the number rises past 50, surgical intervention will be needed. So, our hope is that his number decreases or stays the same at the next checkup. This narrowing can also cause poor circulation. Liam's limbs seem to be getting enough blood flow.
Liam is such a brave little boy! I am always so proud of him at our doctor's visits. I know God will use these experiences to shape him into a man of character and strength.
fluid around his heart - The fluid around Liam's heart, which was a concern the last two times we went to the doctor, is now minimal. It has decreased on its own without intervention. Now we know that his heart should heal itself when fluid develops due to viral infections. It's just a long process. Liam had the stomach flu in January, which created the fluid. His body took until now to heal it. It is impossible to keep him away from all viral infections, but sometimes I wish I could.
fused left Ventricle Valve - (two of the three parts of the valve are fused together, creating leakage and a murmur). There is no change in his valve. I was able to listen to the sound his murmur makes. Liam's heart has an extra swooshing sound between beats. It almost sounds like air whistling through his chest between beats. The leakage is minor enough that nothing should need to be done for a while, if ever.
hole between upper two chambers- We're still hoping that the hole heals itself by the time Liam is 4. It is still measuring the same size.
coarctation of the aorta - The main aorta that leads to the heart is narrowed. Last time we went in it was at a count of 13. The narrowing has increased and is now at 20. This number is likely to fluctuate due to growth spurts. Should the number reach 40, then we have reason to be concerned. If the number rises past 50, surgical intervention will be needed. So, our hope is that his number decreases or stays the same at the next checkup. This narrowing can also cause poor circulation. Liam's limbs seem to be getting enough blood flow.
Liam is such a brave little boy! I am always so proud of him at our doctor's visits. I know God will use these experiences to shape him into a man of character and strength.
Thursday, September 20, 2012
The Scarlet I
I'm apprehensive to write personal posts on this blog, since this is intended as a place to document our family life. Still waters run deep in our family, and we tend to be private people. However, recently Dave reminded me that I may never know who needs to hear the words of this blog for encouragement. It is also very healing for me to look back over older posts and journal entries. I am publishing this post to show a piece of my journey to our family. I think it is a familiar journey for women who struggle to have a family. I want to be honest - for us, our journey to parent-hood was not all sunshine and rainbows. And although Liam made a dramatic entrance into our family and rocked our world for good, we weren't always in a place of joy or acceptance of God's plan.
My hope is that when people see our family and all the obstacles we have overcome, they will see Christ's hand in all of it. For us, Jeremiah 29:11 (for reference - see below our picture) is a way of life. This is an easy statement for us to make now. However, there were times when things seemed hopeless. As I prepare for our daughter's arrival, I want to be sure my heart is not filled with bitterness or regret, so I have visited old journal entries. Here is a piece of my heart. It is an old journal entry of mine, but a struggle I still deal with some days.
A certain bible story is really resonating with me today. I've heard this story many times, but today I especially feel like the woman with the issue of blood. Here's the story -
Matthew 9 - 20 Just then a woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years came up behind him [Jesus] and touched the edge of his cloak. 21 She said to herself, “If I only touch his cloak, I will be healed.” 22 Jesus turned and saw her. “Take heart, daughter,” he said, “your faith has healed you.” And the woman was healed at that moment.
I can't even imagine what it must be like to bleed for twelve years. The woman was considered 'unclean' and had to be separated from the rest of her community. Although I haven't personally experienced such a dramatic health concern, I often feel like an outcast, marked with a scarlet I, for infertile, on my chest. This shame is heightened when I think of the frailty of my body while carrying the twins. My childhood dreams included being pregnant and having 'my' children. I have often prayed, "Lord you have the ability to heal us. Why won't you just heal our infertility and give us our hearts' desire." My pain runs deep. Every time a friend announces they are pregnant, a sharp pain throbs in my heart. I know I shouldn't compare my situation to theirs or their blessings, but it's hard not to be jealous. I believe Christ has the power to heal us, so why is he choosing not to.
Maybe, I am asking for the wrong type of healing. Instead of physical healing for us, I should be asking for healing in my heart. God has promised to be with us. He has planned our lives already. If God's plan is not for us to be parents, my prayer should be to accept that. Although, I know he wouldn't have given us this desire, or talents, if he didn't want us to be parents. If his desire is for me to love outside my comfort zone, then I need to be healed of my short-mindedness. Maybe, God has something really great planned that I can't even fathom. So, I am changing my prayer and grasping the hem of your garment Lord, "Please give me the child you have planned for me and prepare my heart for THAT child. Make me the parent you want me to be, to love unconditionally, and to show your love and grace. Help me to get over my lost dreams and realize the dreams you have designed for me. Please wipe away my scarlet I and replace it with the sign of your cross."
I have come a long way, and God's plan has truly been amazing. Having Liam as a son is even better than I could have imagined and the adventure of getting our daughter is also an amazing journey. The truth though, is that there are still days I feel like an outcast and feel the pains of not being able to be pregnant, especially when so many people announce their news daily. However, I still need to be reminded that God has chosen me to be an adoptive mom, to love my children as my own, and give THEM hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11). It is a humbling experience, but I'm still trustingly grabbing the hem of Christ's garment and praying for him to make me clean.
My hope is that when people see our family and all the obstacles we have overcome, they will see Christ's hand in all of it. For us, Jeremiah 29:11 (for reference - see below our picture) is a way of life. This is an easy statement for us to make now. However, there were times when things seemed hopeless. As I prepare for our daughter's arrival, I want to be sure my heart is not filled with bitterness or regret, so I have visited old journal entries. Here is a piece of my heart. It is an old journal entry of mine, but a struggle I still deal with some days.
A certain bible story is really resonating with me today. I've heard this story many times, but today I especially feel like the woman with the issue of blood. Here's the story -
Matthew 9 - 20 Just then a woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years came up behind him [Jesus] and touched the edge of his cloak. 21 She said to herself, “If I only touch his cloak, I will be healed.” 22 Jesus turned and saw her. “Take heart, daughter,” he said, “your faith has healed you.” And the woman was healed at that moment.
I can't even imagine what it must be like to bleed for twelve years. The woman was considered 'unclean' and had to be separated from the rest of her community. Although I haven't personally experienced such a dramatic health concern, I often feel like an outcast, marked with a scarlet I, for infertile, on my chest. This shame is heightened when I think of the frailty of my body while carrying the twins. My childhood dreams included being pregnant and having 'my' children. I have often prayed, "Lord you have the ability to heal us. Why won't you just heal our infertility and give us our hearts' desire." My pain runs deep. Every time a friend announces they are pregnant, a sharp pain throbs in my heart. I know I shouldn't compare my situation to theirs or their blessings, but it's hard not to be jealous. I believe Christ has the power to heal us, so why is he choosing not to.
Maybe, I am asking for the wrong type of healing. Instead of physical healing for us, I should be asking for healing in my heart. God has promised to be with us. He has planned our lives already. If God's plan is not for us to be parents, my prayer should be to accept that. Although, I know he wouldn't have given us this desire, or talents, if he didn't want us to be parents. If his desire is for me to love outside my comfort zone, then I need to be healed of my short-mindedness. Maybe, God has something really great planned that I can't even fathom. So, I am changing my prayer and grasping the hem of your garment Lord, "Please give me the child you have planned for me and prepare my heart for THAT child. Make me the parent you want me to be, to love unconditionally, and to show your love and grace. Help me to get over my lost dreams and realize the dreams you have designed for me. Please wipe away my scarlet I and replace it with the sign of your cross."
I have come a long way, and God's plan has truly been amazing. Having Liam as a son is even better than I could have imagined and the adventure of getting our daughter is also an amazing journey. The truth though, is that there are still days I feel like an outcast and feel the pains of not being able to be pregnant, especially when so many people announce their news daily. However, I still need to be reminded that God has chosen me to be an adoptive mom, to love my children as my own, and give THEM hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11). It is a humbling experience, but I'm still trustingly grabbing the hem of Christ's garment and praying for him to make me clean.
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