The truth is that the adoption process does not end when we bring our son home. In fact, once we bring him home, the REAL work begins. I posted this blog before we went to get Lilly from China. I am re-posting it now (with revisions) as a reminder for this adoption.
Those who are familiar with international adoption, either by doing it themselves, or knowing someone who has adopted, are aware of the Attachment Period. It is highly recommended that we observe an attachment period when we return home from Korea. This means that we will not have visitors over to our house and we will limit the amount of time spent out of the home. For our son's sake, we need to establish our role as his parents and form the family bond. This will help our son become an adjusted child in the future. He will need to grieve his losses. He has formed relationships with his foster parents. It is important for us to respect the time and process it takes for him to transfer his affection and dependance to us. I know it is a lot to ask, but we ask that our friends and family respect this process, however long it takes. Our son is the only one who can determine how long this process will last. I know you will want to share with us in our joy and journey, so I promise to keep the blog as up-to-date as possible. To our church friends - Dave and I will be taking turns on Sundays, so Liam & Lilly can still attend regularly. Give us a hug or a hand shake when you see us. We may likely be tired and needing encouragement! One of the best ways you can help us is through prayer! I'm sure we will feel your support that way, even when we will feel isolated and in "lock down" (as my mother affectionately calls it).
Here are some specific things you can pray for -
* That our son will show his emotions and start the grieving process right away. That he doesn't bottle his emotions for later.
* That Dave and I have patience and compassion. That we are a strong team.
* That all our hearts are opened and ready and that the Holy Spirit would guide our actions and words.
* That Liam & Lilly feel love for their brother. That Liam & Lilly never doubt our love for them.
* That Liam & Lilly are healthy and safe while we are gone on the first trip and that we all have safe travels on the second trip.
* That we have a great team of doctors and therapists for our son and that they view him as the unique child of God he is.
* And most importantly - Thank God that He has chosen us to be this sweet guy's parents and has opened every door that needed to be opened in order to bring him home. Thank God He allowed us to be parents to three beautiful children, who have been given life for a purpose. Thank God that their birth-mothers chose life!!!
