Dear Adoptive Mom

Since this month is adoption month, I have been thinking about the adoptions of my kids and what I would tell myself about this journey.  Adoptions, like children, are different, but some things are constant in all of them.  If I could go back in time, this is what I would tell myself.  Maybe other adoptive Moms can relate.

Dear Adoptive Mom,
You are embarking on a journey that will change you forever.  There will be times when you will feel unequipped.  You will ask God if He's sure you are the right woman for this job.  You will look at all the obstacles and wonder how you will scale this mountain of challenges.  You will have to write checks for large amounts of money and wonder how it is even possible to do so.  You will see God provide for you in amazing ways, which will confirm that you are making the right choice.  You will have to wait.  In the waiting times, you will grow.  You will feel your child taking up a place in your heart, before even knowing if they exist, or seeing their face.  You will feel a closeness to a woman you've never met and feel unbelievably grateful for her precious gift to you.  You will find yourself praying for her safety and for her future.  Once you see/meet your child you will be overcome with love you never knew possible.  You will believe in miracles!  You will understand God's love and grace like never before. You will fill out more paperwork, get more fingerprints, more physicals, and background checks than the president.  Your finances and other personal information will be an open book.  You will fill out piles and piles of paperwork, which sadly does't end once you bring your child home.  You will have questions about your child and their family history that will never be answered.  Your eyes and heart will be opened to all the children who need and want families.  You will wish there was a way for you to adopt 100 of them.  You will have to become an expert on the conditions of your child.  You will constantly wonder if you are making the right decisions for your children.  You will have to rely on the other Moms who have taken this path before you, and the professionals you've met.  Once again you'll be reminded that all children are different.  One day your child will ask about their birthparents and their adoption story and will try to create their identity.  There will be times your heart will break for them, when life isn't easy, and they feel different and alone.  You will ask yourself, "How do I deal with this?"  Through all of it you will love your child fiercely.  You will rely on God's strength and forgiveness.  You will have sleepless nights.  Adoption is not easy, but is worth it.  Given the opportunity you would do it all again.  Hang in there adoptive Mom!  Remember that God has a plan for you and your child - Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord; plans to give you hope and a future."