Nanjing Massacre Memorial

Today was a rainy day in Nanjing, which was appropriate for visiting the Nanjing Massacre Memorial. It was an emotional and somber visit.  300,000 lives, mainly civilians, were lost during this horrific period in history.  This memorial and museum do a great job of sharing the story and honoring those who were killed.  We knew a little bit about this event through the movie "Flowers of War," but seeing the display in person really left an impact on us.

"Frigidity and horror have frozen this crying baby

poor thing, not knowing mum has been killed

blood, milk, and tears have frozen, never melting"

"My dear mother in her eighties.  Hurry up!  Run away from the bloody hands!"

"A thirteen year old carrying her grandmother.
Flee-flee-flee"

"The devils are coming..."

"The devil has sent the bombers...
the poor orphans, frightened by the vicious laughs of the brutal devils, terrified by the corpses piling up in the alley, have lapsed into numbness."

"My dear wife!  The devil raped you, killed you... I'm right after you."

"December 13, 1937
Began the inhuman massacre.  Bare handed civilians, flee, the only hope to survive."

"They rob and rape.  They set fire and bury people alive... they even killed my 3 month old little grandson"

"Ah close your eyes, rest in peace.  You innocent child.  You poor boy."

Mass grave sight - many layers of bones were found at this spot.  The Japanese murdered the Chinese here and buried them here.

The Offer Place

Peace Sculpture

description for this wall found in picture below...

Words Found on Memorial

Let the white bones fall into sleep

Let the grievance souls rest peacefully

Turn the slaughtering swords to the cast of a warning bell

Turn the names of the departed to be engraved in history

Let the children no longer face with the fear

Let the mother no longer shed their tears

Let war be distant from all mankind

Let peace be spread fully to the world

Gotcha Day Plus Two (& Our 9th Anniversary)

First, let me just say Happy Anniversary to the most amazing husband and father.  I can't imagine being half way around the world with anyone else.  I love you Dave!

Last night we ventured through town with Lilly and took in Nanjing.  My, did we get A LOT of attention.  Most people just take my picture without asking, but a few families wanted to get pictures with me and Lilly (they don't really care about Dave).  There are a lot of stares and questions, which we don't understand.  Most of the time women come up to me and say, "beautiful hair!"  I kind of feel like a celebrity. 

This morning we got to Skype with Liam and my family!!!  The sound wasn't working on our end, but we could hear them and they could see us.  It was so good to hear Liam's little voice!  We miss him terribly.  We really just want to go home and start life all together.  We know Liam is doing well though, because he sat still for maybe 2 minutes and then decided he would rather play with his cousin Verona than talk to us.  If Liam loves Lilly half as much as he love Verona, we'll be in good shape.

Today, we stayed in the hotel, which was nice.  We just spent time bonding with Lilly and taking a break from all the people and attention.

This is how we get around in the business outside.  Lilly loves her carrier.

Lilly slept through the night last night!  She went down at 7:30 and woke up at 6.  She moved around a lot though.

Lilly is a good little eater.  We were concerned that she didn't want to take a bottle.  However, she would rather eat regular food and whatever mom and dad eat - which is good.  She fills up on fruits, vegetables, and noodles, so she doesn't have room for formula.  She does drink water from her bottle throughout the day and occasionally we give her juice with her snack.

playing - I love this outfit, but her skirt kept falling down.  It's 18 months and too big.  We were surprised how little Lilly is,  her pictures made her seem so much bigger.

Mmmm - snack time

so beautiful

We had cookies for dessert.  Lilly was fascinated to watch Dave eat his cookie.

Here are some things we have learned about our Lilly in the past two days -

She doesn't like to wear socks.  She is ticklish on the bottom of her feet and her tummy.  She has learned how to eat almost everything, despite her cleft palate.  She loves to flip through books.  She loves being kissed on her cheeks.  She sings a little song in her sleep and while she is playing.  She wants to walk so badly, but has to hold Mommy's hand to do so.  She is unsteady and should hold two hands, but refuses to (Miss Independent).  Daddy is fun to play with if Mommy is near by, otherwise he is a little scary.  She likes to tease Dad by offering him her food and then taking it away suddenly.  She can say Mama. She wants to use a spoon and is trying to figure that out.  She likes to be rocked and sung to at bedtime.  (Her first night we let her put herself to sleep the way she was used to, but it broke my heart to see her rocking herself to sleep, so the next day at nap-time I rocked her and sang to her.  Now, that's all she wants when it's time to sleep.  After rocking for a couple minutes I can lay her down and she will put herself to sleep - as long as I am sitting next to the crib).  

  
Tomorrow, we will go to the War Memorial.  In 1937 Nanjing was attacked by the Japanese (Nanjing was the capital at that time).  They massacred 300,000 Chinese, including women and children.  It is a sad part of Chinese history.  The Memorial is the sight of the mass grave for those 300,000 people.  After that we will visit a park where Lilly can play and take in nature.  We will be back at the hotel by lunch and nap-time.

Gotcha Day Plus One

Last night Lilly did pretty well, considering it was her first night in a new place with strange people.  Although, we know she has seen our pictures (from her little photo album) and heard our voices (from our recordable storybook).  She went to sleep at 7:30pm.  Lilly loves to be rocked and have her face touched.  She was swaying (trying to rock herself) at about 7pm, so we knew it was time to go to sleep.  She woke up at 2:30am, looked around, and then fell back to sleep.  She woke up for good at 6am.  She had a couple tears this morning.  It must be scary to wake up and have everything be different.  She ate well at breakfast and seems to love watermelon and green beans.
This morning we went back to the same government office as before to finalize paperwork. We are now considered a family!  Lilly got to say goodbye to the two care-givers that brought her.  They gave her a sweet gift of a Jade necklace with a rabbit (the animal for her birth month) and some clay from her hometown of Kunshan.  It is obvious that they all really loved her and cared well for her, because she is transferring attachment so well.
Lilly has been a Momma's girl today.  She actually says Mama and reaches for me.  She plays well with Dave and will eat for him, but wants Mom the second she feels hurt or scared.  I have to be in eye sight at all times.  Her giggles and smiles have continued today.  We have already learned that she has a real cry and fake cry.  Her fake cry usually means Mom isn't giving her enough attention.  Today we also noticed that she likes to suck on her middle two fingers to fall asleep.  I think her Aunt Julie and cousin Ava did the same thing.

It's so fun to dress a little girl!

Lilly's Care-givers - saying goodbye

Official Paperwork

Our Official Family Photo

checking out the huge fish in the lobby

Lilly's Gotcha Day!

Today is Lilly's Gotcha Day - the day she became part of our forever family.  We went to the government office building in Nanjing and waited  for Lilly to arrive with her care-givers.

We watched as two of her care-givers walked up to the building with her.  She was wearing the outfit we sent in her care package!  As soon as they entered the room, they handed her to us.  She wanted to jump out of my arms and back into her care-giver's arms.  However, after about five minutes, and a snack, she was fine.

Then, we had to fill out some paperwork.  Lilly just sat and ate her snack.

We got our picture taken as a family - for one of our documents and then we were able to ask Lilly's care-givers questions about her.  Apparently, Lilly was Miss Popular at the orphanage and EVERYONE loved her.  The director even came to visit her everyday.  They called her Yee-Yee at the orphanage, which is about what Liam says.  We got back all the other things we put in her care package as well, like the disposable camera, blanket, and books.

After finishing up at the office we went to the store and bought things like diapers and formula.  Savor, our facilitator, also talked Dave into buying some beer.  She said he had to try it.  When we got home we started playing.  Lilly's little personality starting showing right away.

It was too hard to crawl and play in her dress, so we changed into better play clothes.

Apparently throwing stacking cups is hilarious.

Other than not wanting to take a bottle tonight, things have been perfect (I think we need to get a different special nipple - we can ask her care-givers tomorrow - we will see them one last time).  She did eat her rice cereal and some puffs and yogurt bites.  She has smiled and laughed.  She is still a little timid, but overall she is fine.  She walked around the hotel room holding mom's hands.  Only time will tell how well she is adjusting, but we're off to a great start.  

Nanjing

Today was spent traveling from Beijing to Nanjing.  Our flight was about 1 hour and 45 minutes long.  Once we arrived in Nanjing our facilitator met us at the airport and helped us get checked into our hotel.  Our hotel in Beijing was very modern.  Our hotel in Nanjing has more of a classic, old China feel.  Our facilitator, Savor, made sure we got a big room with a view.  We have Lilly's crib all set up and her toys ready.  Our gift bags are also ready.  We will give American gifts to the orphanage director and Lilly's primary care-takers tomorrow and then we will give two more gifts to the officials that process our paperwork on Tuesday.  Tuesday we will process the adoption paperwork.  Savor says we will officially be considered a family by China at that point.

our room - plenty of room for Lilly to play

After a little trouble we finally got the internet up and running.

Lilly's toys - we want her to get familiar with the other children in the family, so we have pictures for her to look at.

We are missing Liam like CRAZY!!!  We are looking forward to Skyping with him in a couple days.  Being away from him has been the most challenging part of this trip.  However, it is important for us to devote this time to Lilly, and we know Liam is in good hands.  Today as we prepare for Lilly's Gotcha Day, we keep thinking back to the moment we met Liam for the first time.  We waited for what seemed like a lifetime to be parents.  We had Liam in our hearts long before we even knew he was ours.  We prayed and begged God to give us a child, and Liam was that answer to prayer.  The second he was placed in my arms all my waiting and praying seemed worth it.  I was meant to be the mommy of this boy and he was meant to be our son all along.  At that moment, I knew there was a place in my heart that only Liam could fill.  I have been praying for Lilly, even before we saw her face or knew where she was from and I know that just like Liam, God created me to be her mommy, and Lilly to be my daughter.  I know we will have to work through her grief and that her love for us won't be instant, but I know the moment she is in my arms, I will be her mother forever!  I am in awe of God's plan for our family and how it has all unfolded.  
Here is my most recent letter to Lilly...
Dearest Lilly,
Tomorrow is your Gotcha Day - the day you become part of our family forever.  Lilly, we have been praying for you, that your heart will be ready to accept us, and that we will be the kind of parents that you need.  We are so excited to hold you and start life as a family of four.  Your older brother Liam is so anxious to be your big brother.  He loves you already!  We promise to show you how much we love you every day.  Sweet girl, you were given life for a reason and God has a great purpose for your life.  We are so blessed to be part of that journey.  We are so thankful to be your parents. 

Love, Mom & Dad

Sight Seeing Day 2 - Forbidden City and Imperial Gardens

The hotel breakfasts are amazing.  They definitely cater to Westerners and have a great deal of comfort foods.  Dave is able to get coffee, which is good for everyone.

Today we went to the Forbidden City and Imperial Gardens.  It was very crowded and hot.  However, having Peter with us helped.  He knew how to navigate through the crowds.  The Forbidden City was built by the Emperor who moved the capital to Beijing.

outside the gate

The buildings are decorated with lions and dragons.  The use of vibrant colors showed the importance of the emperor.

view of Forbidden City from top of the hill in Imperial Gardens

The Imperial Gardens were breath-taking.  It is peony season and there were fields and fields of various types of peonies.  There were many musicians and dancers throughout the park.  They were meeting up with friends, just to play, sing, dance and have fun.  There were impromptu dance lessons. 

dancing in the park

this one was my favorite

Here are some pictures of us at the shopping center near our hotel.

What's Next -

Tomorrow (Sunday) we will fly to Nanjing.  Nanjing is the capital city in the province Lilly is from.  On Monday morning at 9am, we get Lilly!