Waiting...

A dear friend of mine, and also an adoptive mom, sent me this email (below).  It is so true.  I long to kiss my daughter's chubby cheeks, tell her I love her, and sing to her.  It is so hard to explain, but I have had this little girl in my heart for such a long time, even since I was a little girl.  I am not sure if God is granting me the desires of my heart, or if He put the desire in my heart.  It doesn't really matter, but it's nice to know that God has been preparing us for this moment.  Esther 4:14 comes to mind - "And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?”  Somehow, I knew Lilly would be my daughter.  I am really trying to be the best wife, mother, teacher, and friend that I can be in this waiting period.  Some days the waiting is very hard.  I catch myself staring at her picture wondering what she's doing and how she's doing.  I'm excited and anxious.  I am just trying to trust God's timing.  He's shown us many times that His plan is perfect.  Liam's arrival to our family is testament to that!  Romans 8:28 - "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."  So, if I seem absent minded, please know that I'm probably just daydreaming about my little girl, and anticipating the time when my whole family will be together.

Now begins the hard part. Everyone thinks the paperwork and waiting for the referral is hard, but now is torture. Every night you will see your daughter's beautiful face and beg God to let you put her to sleep at night. You will wake up at night, wondering if your little girl is crying and why can't you be there to comfort her. I will pray for you, for patience and a trust in God's timing. I will pray for Lilly, that God will guard and protect her and that He would make her heart ready for a family.

Now, also, begins the fun part. You have a face when you imagine her in clothes you pick out, in the bedroom you decorate, and in the family photos on the wall. You stare at her picture while reading a book or playing with Liam. Your heart rejoices at the new member of your family.